Grandma's shelf
Things she thinks you should own. You didn't ask. Some links earn us a few cents, which she has already decided is not enough.
Serious kitchen
Ninja Nutri-Plus Personal Blender
“One cup? Since when are you only feeding yourself, bubbeleh?”
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Turelar Handheld Immersion Blender Set
“Without this stick, your soup is just warm wet vegetables.”
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Ninja UltraCrush Professional Blender
“You call that blending? Make real puree, you look thin.”
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Fashion and handbags
Bagsmart Puffy Work Tote Bag
“Just saying, a grocery tote is not a work bag.”
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BS-VOG Clear Stadium Crossbody Purse
“Security can see everything, including that you need a sweater.”
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Toughergun Small Slim Leather Wallet
“A proper wallet, so you stop losing my birthday money.”
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Bagstellar Puffer Travel Tote Bag
“Sixteen pockets and still no room to call your grandmother?”
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KKXIU Retro Hobo Shoulder Purse
“You look so put together, whoever said you did not?”
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Holidays
Menorah
“The one from college with the wax? Retire it.”
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Seder plate
“You're hosting this year. I decided.”
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Honey pot for Rosh Hashanah
“A sweet year. Also, call more.”
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Shabbat table
Challah board with knife
“You're using a cutting board? For challah? Oy.”
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Shabbat candlesticks
“Light them. Eighteen minutes before, not after.”
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Kiddush cup
“Silver. It's a cup, not a paper thing.”
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Judaica and gifts
Hebrew name necklace
“For the granddaughter. She'll pretend not to love it.”
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Mezuzah with scroll
“The doorpost has been naked for two years.”
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Hamsa wall hanging
“Can't hurt. That's the whole theology.”
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Deli and pantry
Chocolate babka
“Buy two. One never makes it home.”
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Halva
“A little piece. A little piece. Suddenly it's gone.”
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Kosher dill pickles
“A sandwich without one is just bread with regrets.”
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Books and comedy
Jewish cookbook classics
“Recipes I already told you. In writing.”
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Yiddish phrase book
“So you'll know what I'm saying about you.”
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Grandma-approved practicals
Heating pad
“Your back. Don't argue, I heard you on the phone.”
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Glass food storage set
“For leftovers you're taking. This is not a debate.”
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Reading glasses multipack
“Three pairs. You lose them, this is known.”
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Soup and cure-alls
Matzo ball soup mix
“Penicillin, but it tastes like something.”
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Heavy-bottom stockpot
“Too big. You'll thank me in November.”
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Electric kettle
“Tea fixes more than you think. Sit.”
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